Every night at 8pm in my neighborhood, we all gather on our balconies, or rooftops, to whoop and clap for first responders, and so many more. These are the ones for whom I whoop:
- My mother for staying in her house (mostly)
- Doctors, nurses, first responders and anyone working within sneezing distance of a hospital
- Grocery store employees
- Delivery drivers
- My indoor cats who, when I told them I would be on lockdown for the foreseeable future, replied, “Turnabout is fair play”
- All the dogs who are thrilled to be getting dozens of walks, but dismayed that no stranger will pet them anymore
- Hobbs and all the little kids who can’t go to the playground
- Adey and all the big kids that can’t go to camp
- Ballet dancers everywhere
- Anyone whose job was lost or put on hold
- Anyone who still has to work through this
- Those in new relationships
- Those that are single
- Those that are about to be single if this goes on much longer
- Therapists
- The lions in Africa that are sleeping on the road in Kruger National Park
- That pair of penguins strolling Chicago’s Shedd Aquarium
- The entire travel industry
- All the writers whose books I am now reading
- Parents
- Grown kids trying to keep their elder parents inside (I’m looking at you, Mom)
- Josie and all the expecting new moms
- All the teachers who can’t teach during this
- All the teachers who have to try and teach during this (and Joe, please send me the video of Nate’s kindergarten attempting Zoom class)
- All the parents who have suddenly become teachers
- All those worried about money or food
- Everyone who had to put their dreams on hold
- Cleaning crews everywhere
- Gardeners (when they are not leaf blowing)
- OMG the trash and recycle people, thank you
- Ok fine, Amazon (Even though they don’t understand that puzzles for my mother should qualify as emergency items and be shipped asap)
- Anyone with a preexisting condition
- People who stay home
- People who have to go out
- Everyone who wears a mask
- Everyone who can’t wait till we no longer need to wear masks
- People who sew their own masks
- Everyone who died too soon because of this
- Everyone who fought so hard not to
- All those who are trying to use this time to become better at something
- All those who are barely surviving
- All the old people who finally learned how to use FaceTime and Zoom (Mom!)
- All the old people who can’t figure out how to use FaceTime and Zoom (Also… Mom)
- Anyone who had to say goodbye to a loved one via FaceTime
- Any nurse who held that phone
- All those who never got to say goodbye
- All the scientists rushing for a vaccine
- All the people volunteering to test potential vaccines
- Whoever made Worldometer’s Coronavirus World Wide Tracker
- Everyone who tries to have a little more patience
- And for all those crazy souls within earshot, who come out of their homes or stand on balconies or rooftops to whoop and clap and ring cowbells. I don’t know you. I’ve never seen you, beyond your dim balcony light silhouette, but thank you.
*Read previous post “Whooping and Clapping“
Or, for something more ridiculous, read “Emergency Items, or, Mom Explains the Internet“
SARCASM WILL SAVE YOU 